2011: Nick and I knew we wanted to start a family, and planned to wait about a year from June to start trying. That didn't last, and after lots of prayer and consideration right about Thanksgiving we officially were trying. Fast forward to...
2012: Still not pregnant, we decided to visit a specialist. I have PCOS and knew that it could be interfering with our attempts. We were right and were going to start fertility treatments in September. On the first ultrasound to make sure everything was looking good before the treatments I had a cyst that made them wait another month... God's timing is so perfect and wouldn't you know I got pregnant that month anyway, without the costly treatments needed. He is good! Due June 25, 2013 we were SO excited, and couldn't wait to be able to tell everyone. Fast forward through a pleasant and relatively smooth pregnancy (no morning sickness, weight loss then normal gain, some issues with what I thought was indigestion, hip pain that was fixed with chiropractic care and a little basketball for a baby bump), we found out it's a HE, and no longer "the baby" but Anthony James (or AJ).
May 5 2013: I woke up with a familiar awful pain in my chest, what I had written off as indigestion the previous 2 times it had happened several weeks before. I got sick, and went back to bed hoping it would subside within the hour as it had before. This time it didn't subside and after doing some google searching, I woke Nick up thinking I might be passing gall stones. We called the after hours line for my OB and they said we needed to go to the emergency room (trip #1!). After blood work, an ultrasound of my gall bladder area and a phone call to the OB by the ER doctors, I was admitted to the PICU because they quickly realized I had HELLP syndrome. This is a variant of preeclampsia that you can read about here if you want to know more... pretty scary stuff (which I'm glad I didn't fully understand till after the fact). The next few days were a whirlwind of specialists, bed rest, feeling awful due to magnesium sulfate which is a medicine they give to prevent seizures, and the doctors decision that at 33 weeks Anthony had to come as soon as possible. Because he was so early there was no question that he would be in the NICU, and some of the nurses came in and explained to Nick and I what would happen in the moments after he was born. My original plan was to take advantage of Family Beginnings, a natural birthing center within the hospital. They have jacuzzi tubs, and a "home" type setting with a full size bed instead of a hospital bed and a less medical feel to them. You must be between 37-41 weeks pregnant, and low risk to deliver in FB... well there went that plan!
On Sunday they had given me a steroid shot to help Anthony's lungs develop quickly, and another on Monday. Throughout the weekend I had many visitors stop by to support us and pray over us. Each and every one meant so much! Monday evening I was given a medicine called Cervidil to get things started with the induction, and on Monday morning I was dilated to 2cm and a Foley bulb was inserted. Once that was finished working, I was dialated to about 4cm and they began to give me pitocin through my IV. At about 2pm I was checked and had dilated to 5cm and was 80% effaced. Contractions became more intense in duration, frequency, and strength. As my contractions intensified, my blood pressure got higher and higher, and the doctor ordered a blood pressure medicine through my IV. By 10pm I had only dilated another centimeter, and my pitocin had to be turned down because my contractions were coming one on top of the other, and were far too intense. This whole time I was in back labor as well (Anthony was face up instead of down, causing intense pressure on my back). I was getting no rest between contractions, and my body began to shake uncontrollably. By 4am I was not able to control my body through the pain and exhaustion of the pitocin to relax in order for the contractions to do their job. I decided to get an injection of fentanyl, which allowed my body to relax slightly, but did not help at all with the pain. At that point Nick and I decided an epidural was the best choice. With my blood pressure getting higher as the pain increased, the risk of an emergency c-section under general anesthesia increased and already having an epidural would prevent the general anesthesia if a c-section was needed, as well as allow my body to relax and my blood pressure to stabilize. This was definitely the right decision, as I don't think I would have been able to push when it came time had I continued as exhausted as I was. By about 8am when the nurse checked me one last time I had dilated fully and the doctor was called. He broke my water and we moved to the OR to push because I was delivering so early and Anthony would be going to the NICU. The NICU is right next to the OR and we were in a room that connected to it so he could be cared for immediately. I pushed for about 35 minutes and with Nicks help I delivered Anthony at 8:57am on Wednesday May 8, 2013. 3lbs, 1oz and 16.5 inches long. Such a beautiful and moving experience, even in the midst of all of the stress, confusion, and unknowns of the situation. I of course cried, and when Dr. Guy (who I am forever grateful to!) suctioned Anthony's nose and mouth he also cried. I couldn't believe it, and went from crying to sobbing. Nick was able to go with Anthony and take some pictures, and he was doing so well (his APGAR was 8-9) that they allowed Nick to hold him, and bring him to me to hold as well.
At that point began our NICU journey, which lasted just over 3 weeks. I will write in more detail about that, as well as the loops that continued on the roller coaster with my own health later... including 3 more ER visits and gall bladder removal surgery... but that's another story for another blog post :)
Fresh baby!
First family photo!
Anthony's tiny hand and foot with my hand (which is not very big itself) - so tiny!